trained thoughts

I was on the train this morning reading time when a class of kids got on the train, there have been lots of kids on the train lately because they're having field trips all at the same time. this class was around the age of 6/7 years old and this little girl was talking to her friend when she looked down and pulled out a cell phone with a sticker on it and talked for the rest of the time they were on the train. a six year old with a cell phone? wow. it does make a little sense here since all incoming calls are free no matter where they are from but i find it a little strange that a 6 year old would rock a cell phone to school. i'm old.

is this new or have i been under unsaid rock for a while?

the pistons keep on ripping it

well after my much deserved muted gloat session which was today (effin' swedes don't know a damn thing about the nba but i called all expiates to lord it over them) i came across an issue. today we're jeffersoning up to the top floor of the office building my job is in and moving always gives me a sense of newness and a reason to become organized, at least work on it. now organization and i are old friends we go back to school evenings where i'd spend 98% of my times organizing, which in return would drain my energy for the actual studying times. moving along, i have come to a dilemma of sorts: firefox or safari. now to the pc'ers reading this who have yet to have been touched by the holy cult of mac this dilemma seems rather quaint, well it isn't. if you've read this blog for a while you have seen me get my geek on explaining the soothing nature of firefox and countless others have received emails extolling the virtues of this mozilla creation. the add-ons and fuzzy feeling you get are all good reasons to rock it but more and more the overall beauty and ease of use of safari has moved it into the number one spot. sure i haven't figured out everything on it yet, like rss reading (i know how to do it but it doesn't yet match my sage viewing experience). anyhoo i'm at a lost and using both for both sake though safari is edging up toward 89.4% at this time...

wait, what the hell am i talking about?

sorry, carry on.

i've been looking around the apartment

wondering where i'm going to put my new 65 inch tv when it comes out, of course i'm waiting breathlessly for the 82 inch Samsung but the 65 inch will suffice until that one comes out. there is one other thing besides not being able to afford it, it's figuring out a place that i can put it without wifey getting mad because it takes up a whole wall in the living room.


back to pondering, shit i should be asleep (only to wake to the glorious news that the finals will include my pistons).

how many times i gotta tell ya'll?

the pistons are going to win in 7? repeat this mantra 'l is always right, l is always right' i keep telling people but nah they wanna act in disbelief that i don't know what i'm talking about. *shaking head* sure you can say that it's wade being out or that shaq is 300 years old and his part-time policeman's utility belt is showing him down but the undeniable truth of the matter is that the pistons will continue to prevail in their move toward the 2nd title in two years. sleep, hate or whatever you'd like to do but i am right.


respect my ish nnnhuh

thank you*




*this public service announcement has been brought to you by ldef

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hitch is a good example of the 'no chemistry' and plotlessness. this yawn-fest is clockfull of predictability and seems that the dialogue was written for a GED class writing project. not that there is anything wrong with GEDs, due to my untimely expultion from the class of '93... nevermind, this movie sucks, just thought i'd save you from a wasted video rental.

so i haven't been posting much lately

though things are inching on in my direction it's been hard to find the time to tap it out here. lately i've been thinking about the curse of being raised in a very strict religious environment and the long lasting effects that come with it. even though my conscious mind has rejected that and christianity on a whole those creepy little fears that religion instilled still exist. it's unfortunate that one can not simply decide the rid themselves of these issues but i'm starting to understand that i will be fighting the first 18-24 years of my life forever. it can be accepted, the fight, but i really don't want to pass these things down to my offspring (all 29 of them) in the future. i would like to preserve certain aspects of it though but can't quite figure out how to give it to them (all 29 of them) in a way that doesn't alter their choices.

sorry about the pontification there but it's been on loop in my mind lately.

otherwise after fifty false starts and blown tires i can finally say that monday is the day! yep, the site i run www.desofo.com will officially be launched and the millions and millions who view this blog will run over to it and buy the album, which is the dopest album of all time and has cured cancer on many occasions plus actually raised people from the dead while starting world peace and harmony. rolling stone will give it a 1,000,000 out of 5 and say that without this album the world could not continue spinning. sooo, your going to run over there and pay for it then download it and enjoy it along with me :-) of course i'll have to thank damn near every person linked on this site (please look over to your right and click away) for helping me along this excruciating looong journey. i'd love to go on but i believe that that's prince on my cell phone callilng to see if he can contribute to the next album, if i decide to do it again :-) nicolay (of foreign exchange fame) arranged the album, for which i owe him my first and second born children so go buy it, on monday.

insomniac's symphony

my job has taught me that you'll never think of everything you can think of when your supposed to, which got me thinking about if i was 'god.' well i would have forgotten a few things such as:

you'd get dizzy when you walk because i wouldn't have thought to have the eyes adjust.

you'd smell like hot shit because i wouldn't have thought of making your digestive system smell proof.

fingerprints wouldn't exist, it seems that it would take a long time to come up with an infinite equation for fingerprints so i would have let that one go.

love would have never crossed my mind, neither would fear or pain.

sex would have been quite different, if i even thought about it in the first place.

things like trees and grass wouldn't have anything to do with fresh air and would most likely look like atari 2600 grass.

sleep wouldn't happen either, which it isn't at this moment but i'll be aiight.


glad i'm not 'god'

why do we front

like R. Kelly isn't certified fucking crazy? just heard his song 'trapped in the closet' *shaking head*


*sigh*

required reading

sure the last picture had a short shelf life but i'm a busy man an emails begging me to find other pictures that are similar go on def (yes def) ears, 'cause we marauder for'... nevermind. anyway life is starting to show some bright spots and i've been treating ldef is utter disrespect but i'm trying to reach the americanswedish dream here guys and that takes hard work and a very big gun. oh trailing off seems to be a thing that comes with age. speaking of which i was in a meeting the other day and the guy, we've had meetings before, said something like "since your 30" and i had to remind myself.

wifey equals camera as of late. all signs point to the procreation project that my best friend just completed but 2025 sound like a great time to begin, if you ask me.


k, moving along. this is today's required reading it's ill for many reasons but pay attention to the scribes jobs and soon you'll see.

next up: dear white people, don't use the word wigger without expecting retaliation. thank you.


l

i'm sitting at work

happend to see kung fu hustle yesterday and was blown away. the visuals were stunning and it was refreshing to see a movie with those type of visuals that doesn't take itself so damn seriously.


back to the soon to be completed grind.

pistons

my pistons were able to pull it off yesterday as i watched espn.com's live time updates of the game. watching the game via states on your computer screen isn't exactly the type of thing i'd refer to has heart stopping. i'm thinking about paying for a web link of the nba games because i have to see them in the finals this year, last year made me ice grill wifey and randomly curse in random situations.


tiger is the truth people if your sitting behind one of those p and c thingys you need to run out cop a powerbook and take your first breath of air. of course i being me haven't figured out half of the stuff on there but for each one that i stumble on i cheer, i really do. we all will figure this out though.

13th floor/Growing Old

Conceive true deception multiplied a million fold
Visualize the yin and yang in a battle so intense
that we get em confused
The resident evil specialize in misconstruing
We wanna be at a presidential level -- what are we doing?
Foolin ourself, clownin ourself, playin ourself
By not bein ourself
We can't babble no more than we can bob our head offbeat
Nimrod by the time we forty cause we can't get our meat
While we ask no reason for the misplacement of the season
look at the picture that's painted
Tainted as the mind who's blinded to the point
where Sodomites get all the rights
We fall for fights with fisticuffs
Get pissed enough to miss the bus
It disgusts me to see my folks run up on
I say stand up on deception of time all of Revelations
And recognize this mind on the reality of horror
known as mankind
Jesus and his twelve disciples make thirteen
A righteous number of righteous men
Even Judas the Betrayer came true in the end
The Devil say the end is the beginning
They teach that we were the product of incest
Invest no level of self into their system of Paganomics
Stand with us and don't look back upon it
Just face this mindstate
Otherwise Babylon...

My memories of yesterday...


Big Rube

so i got a powerbook today

i feel powerful, sure it's not 'brand new' but it's 3 million times faster than my ibook, who looks so small, so insignificant at this point. the only problem is that the genius' over at mac came up with a great idea to help powerbook people out when they got a new powerbook but didn't come up with anything for those of us stepping up. sooo, i have to go through all of the crap i have transferred from my ibook and try and figure out ways to load it in before i hand it over to the dude that bought it tomorrow *sigh*

just thought i'd share. wow, this 15 inch got me open though.


coffee and cursing update:

figured out how to do somethings but still at a loss for quite a few others. for instance i transferred all of my emails over BUT it refuses to finish my addresses. *deep sigh while gritting teeth*

Dear Bush people,

i really would like to ask how you balance things out in your head regarding bush and co. i read the new incessantly and it seems that a lot of people get blown up in iraq daily, from little iraqi kids to your kids, but you still blankly stare ahead
with your bush flag raised.

first off i would like to state that your voting for him is your choice and i defend that choice against anal ass europeans on a daily basis. seeing that i do, i do feel that it would be helpful if you shared some insight as to why you blindly follow this guy.

now, i don't swing off the nuts of clinton and personally felt that he was/is a charismatic chameleon with his own personal elevation behind his every choice. now that we've got that stated it is a fact that we americans are in a worse position then we were before he took the reigns. the economy sucks, we're in a useless war with no end in sight and deficit it ridiculous. to top it off bush, with his john wayne inspired "freedom" swagger, has ignored the sudanese crisis while not doing a damn thing to numerous other countries that try to blatantly step all over this 'line' he's drawn in the sand while he does. not. a. damn. thing. here's a guy that claims he's out to free the world but doesn't seem to do it and when he supposedly tried he made it worse. sorry about the rant but i am really at loss on this point and as to why people aren't rioting right now.
dunno, just wondering.

my shoe game 5-5-5

i'm sick wit it but play with a handicap (size 15) so when i'm fortunate to come across some ishness that fits i get in. today the sun shined literally and figuratively on me and upped my shoe game by 200%. now the average person wouldn't get that amped about some shoes but i am not your average and rock the same damn shoes till i find something, anything. which usually is right about UN multi-translator status, so this is b.i.g.

anyway it's some holiday here so wifey's sister and her nephew are here and we've chilled hard today and dude's infinite supply of energy is something to behold.


still have some work to finish up on but finally seeing lights at the end of the tunnel.

NIke

why do you pay money to the designers of the Jordans? those shits looks terrible and have for quite a while now.

*shaking head* this.....

*sigh*

if you don't have this month's the Fader

cop it now! i on the other hand have to wait until 2040 when it actually touches down in sweden *sigh* there's a write up by non other than some dude who was illiterate until I taught him how to read and write in late 2000 about j*davey i.e. the truth so it's worth your time. in fact if you do not cop it i will banish you from every trespassing on the ldef blog again.

with that said things are heading toward lovely in this direction and work is starting to feel grown up. wifey is at the gym and i'm sitting here listening to some birds sing at each other off tune, guess how that's how they get down in sweden. oh, speaking of birds i noticed that they didn't have robins and the like here but had these big black birds. anyway i was watching discovery channel (which is always in english) on of the first weeks i was here and they did this thing on those birds and they were showing how they eat flesh, eat flesh??? huh, robins may eat worms which for all intents and purposes IS flesh but it ain't stripping a cow clean. well that fucked up my 'watching the birds on a park bench stee' and i am forever ice grilling these scary feathery fuckers. i'm glad that i could share that.

in other news the pistons took an l last night to the 76er's because iverson decided to walk on water near the end. of course this is based off of my reading about it because i can't see the games here and if i could they would come on around 12am and finish right about the time that i need to wake up. sooo, i'm thinking that if any of you geeks has any 'ideas' as to how i could see the games please e me and we'll all be happy shiny people.

this week i promise to hip you all toward the vague statements i've spoken about which is my 'project' that seems to drag on and on, really. seriously.

well back to my obsessive playing of GTA where i've given up on the actual missions for a life of killing police officers with cheat codes and a jet pack!

"i am a blankness, the contained center of an O"

inner breathlessness, outer restlessness
by the time i caught up to freedom i was out of breath
grandma asked me what i'm running for
i guess i'm out for the same thing the sun is sunning for
what mothers birth their youngens for
and some say jesus coming for
for all i know the earth is spinning slow
suns at half mast 'cause masses ain't aglow
on bended knee, prostrate before an altered tree
i've made the forest suit me
tables and chairs
papers and prayers
matter versus spirit
a metal ladder
a wooden cross
a plastic bottle of water
a mandala encased in glass
a spirit encased in flesh
sound from shaped hollows
the thickest of mucus released from heightened passion
a man that cries in his sleep
a truth that has gone out of fashion
a mode of expression
a paint splattered wall
a carton of cigarettes
a bouquet of corpses
a dying forest
a nurtured garden
a privatized prison
a candle with a broken wick
a puddle that reflects the sun
a piece of paper with my name on it
i'm surrounded
i surrender
all
all that i am i have been
all i have been has been a long time coming
i am becoming all that i am
the spittle that surrounds the mouth-piece of the flute
unheard, yet felt
a gathered wetness
a quiet moisture
sound trapped in a bubble
released into wind
wind fellows and land merchants
we are history's detergent
water soluble, light particles, articles of cleansing breath
articles amending death
these words are not tools of communication
they are shards of metal
dropped from eight story windows
they are waterfalls and gas leaks
aged thoughts rolled in tobacco leaf
the tools of a trade
barbers barred, barred of barters
catch phrases and misunderstandings
but they are not what i feel when i am alone
surrounded by everything and nothing
and there isn't a word or phrase to be caught
a verse to be recited
a man to de-fill my being in those moments
i am blankness, the contained center of an "o"
the pyramidic containment of an "a"
i stand in the middle of all that i have learned
all that i have memorized
all that i've known by heart
unable to reach any of it
there is no sadness
there is no bliss
it is a forgotten memory
a memorable escape route that only is found by not looking
there, in the spine of the dictionary the words are worthless
they are a mere weight pressing against my thoughtlessness
but then, who else can speak of thoughtlessness with such confidence
who else has learned to sling these ancient ideas
like dead rats held by their tails
so as not to infect this newly oiled skin
i can think of nothing heavier than an airplane
i can think of no greater conglomerate of steel and metal
i can think of nothing less likely to fly
there are no wings more weighted
i too have felt a heaviness
the stare of man guessing at my being
yes i am homeless
a homeless man making offerings to the after-future
sculpting rubber tree forests out of worn tires and shoe soles
a nation unified in exhale
a cloud of smoke
a native pipe ceremony
all the gathered cigarette butts piled in heaps
snow covered mountains
lipsticks smeared and shriveled
offerings to an afterworld
tattoo guns and plastic wrappers
broken zippers and dead eyed dolls
it's all overwhelming me, oak and elming me
i have seeded a forest of myself
little books from tall trees
it matters not what this paper be made of
give me notebooks made of human flesh
dried on steel hooks and nooses
make uses of use, uses of us
it's all overwhelming me, oak and elming me
i have seeded a forest of myself
little books from tall trees
on bended knee
prostrate before an altered tree
i've made the forest suit me
tables and chairs
papers and prayers
matter vs. spirit, through meditation
i program my heart to beat breakbeats and hum basslines on exhalation


- saul williams

*applying warpaint*

still on the warpath but feel more like myself today because of the noxzema and suave deoderant i got yesterday by one of the few 'my fellow americans' here. on the pro-black scale i'm three-fifths toward malcolm right now and steadily rising.

my project is looking like it's almost finished *crossing fingers* and hopefully we'll have a red carpet premier in the near, near future. after a "tense" weekend i'm getting used to going to work and the great feeling of coming home to quiet and relaxation.

i'm rocking this esthero and mop's 9th wonder produced instigator at the moment.

There's a Riot Going On

or about to. a swedish ice cream company called Nogger decided to come out with a new ice cream called Nogger Black. the thing is that the swedish word for black is 'svart' and the ads are writing in a graffiti-ish logo.

the problem is that swedes, known for their tennis elbow induced from constant back patting, refuse to think of themselves as racist and thus not offended by the ad in general. in fact they say that race is an amerikkkan problem so they don't see the big deal. See the big deal? it's not your issue to be offended so why should i have to explain why i'm offended? people have actually tried to argue that racism isn't a problem here, which of course a white swede would know all to well.

The fact that they separate themselves from "american" racism is simply laughable. sweden was the first country to recognize the states as a separate entity from Britain, thus getting cut rate cotton prices which of course made the slave masters add benefits (spa treatments and such) and raises to the slaves to make sure they could meet this extra demand with a smile on their beautiful black faces. let's not get into the swedish built slave ships and various swedish slave ports during the slave trade.

Last night wifey was watching a swedish comedy show called Hey Baberiba where they did bit where a 'host' asked a 'guest' questions and they answered it wrong. they asked what the name of the ice cream was that everyone is talking about and the 'guest' responded "Nigger."

i've already called the tv station and asked for an apology, i'm sick of this shit and the polar opp of an arm chair revolutionary. if you have any ideas as to how to bring light to this shit hit me.

nat turner

once upon a time (XXX edition)

Oct. '75

April '82




today, toothpick still included

now that's humor

wow

"damn, this hat is heavier than i thought"

"now think pope thoughts..."

i am

30

1

lately when i've been eating food seems to go down the wrong pipe, almost but not really. maybe this is part of being old. today i took the time to look at my 29 year old self and i would say that though i treated my body like a redheaded stepchild with buck teeth i'm pretty happy with the fact that i don't actually look old. no crinkly things around my eyes or lines in my enormous forehead (shout out to Sade *special forehead nod*). speaking of heads i swear i've had the same size head my whole life, which was uncomfortable as a child 'specially with shoe sizes that stayed ahead of my age. thank god i grew because it would suck to be walking around with enormous hands, head and feet. i would have looked like a video game character. well, there is something that i'm happy about and appreciate god for answering my multi-day prayers. also i'm sure that since i started smoking at 17 that it stunted my growth probably a little, for which i'm happy about because 6'4 is the best height possible and since I'm evenly proportioned a lot of people never realize it until i stand up next to them and show them that i breathe cleaner fresher air though i do stop a lot of the harmful UV rays but that's what melanin is for :-) of course you'd need to wonder about people that assume i'm shorter when they're sitting there looking across at my hands and head. i've actually had people argue with me about my height like they no better than i. k, sorry, it's just that it's less than 24 hours left in my 20's and i'm a little nervous for various reasons.

yesterday evening i went to Timbuktu's all ages concert (he's big, really big here) and during his current hit he shouts me out so i had all these little kids who stared intently at the stage now staring at me wondering what it must be like to be his friend and what we must talk about. one little boy stared for a whole minute after that then resumed his open mouth staring at the stage. now i might be wrong because timbuk's like wu and loves the kids and maybe dude was 'special' for which i'll go to hell for, but dude stared with his mouth open the whole time and even took pictures with his phone without stopping staring. regardless to the fact that i knew 1 out of 5 words he said because his southern swedish is hard to translate and by the end of the concert i had a splitting headache he ripped it and and ras and i got some work done. if your one of the 23408502345899435 people that read this blog you should buy timbuktu's album, it's very enjoyable, not to mention when your bumping it in your hybrid suv you can act like you understand what he's saying and your friends will sweat you.

i will probably write more today if I get a chance but back to work now.

my hands hurt

my saturday of 'writing' has been the following:

put hands on computer then check a blog, smoke cigerrette, check google news, stare at wall, replace hands then repeat in any order.


i rarely get overwhelmed to a point where i'm unable to accomplish things but i am man enough to admit that right about...

Manifest

yesterday i went on my first swedish business trip. i went to gothenburg for the first time for what turned into an ill meeting. there's something grown about finally going on my first swedish business trip and befitting for the last week of my twenties. i try to stop and appreciate little things and judging from where i was 8 months ago this was more than a little thing. i woke up this morning with the feeling swinging back on a system that is made for breaking non-swedes and seeing it flinch or something. enough of the reflective ish i have more than enough marathoning through my mind at the i needed that break from the norm because work is suffocating me as of late with a workload that doesn't make any type of sense.

met my coworker's 2 year old daughter yesterday who speaks swedish and english and she was cool :-) she has 4 of the same teddy bears because they were going to get discontinued and her mom and grandmother bought 2 at the same time without knowing. anyway she aptly named them: teddy one, teddy 2, teddy dagis(nursery school) and teddy holiday. she has specific uses for each teddy with teddy one obviously rocking the top spot. hilarious

my great aunt turned 90 the other day and she was on her way out when i called her to wish her a happy bday. if 90 looks for me like it does for everyone in my family then i'm not too worried about getting old. her nephew, my cousin turned 60 two days before that and my nephew hit 11 on sunday. my fellow aries :-)

welp back to the grind.

happy belated bday Billie

such a haunted spirit who's win/lose battles with her demons allowed a truthfulness you could hear all through her voice. happy birthday goes out to you and i hope peace was reached.

columbia university is playing nathan but billie 24/7 since April first until next friday check 'em out.

the good ole days

brought to you by Fox News and Sinclar Broadcasting

no nyc for my bday :-(

that's right folks it has a been decided but i can honestly say that i feel good knowing that i did every semilegal thing possible to pull this off and nadda damn thing happened. so i called up my friends over at google and told them to give me a consolation prize and they did! so now i can look at semi-creepy satellite photos that are only about a year old of nyc! sure it's not like being there but it does give you a cia-ish type of stalker vibe but hey it is fun.

in other news my ish that was supposed to be done by friday is now postponed until next friday due to technical issue, really. sure you haven't a clue what i'm talking about but hey.


a special shout out goes to the shitload of people that google is sending through Ldef's direction as of the last week or so. hi! enjoy and if you want to read some real writing feel free to click on the people linked on the side of my blog their the ishness personified. welp back to working on my list of people I don't like.

i am not a happy camper (wifey's bday post)

happy bday to wifey :-) she is "not worried about thirty" because today's her 27th. unfortunately it's also the day that makes or breaks the nyc trip which is grading on our nerves. i want need nothing more than to get out of this country before i'm at ikea with a sawed-off blaming my insanity on god, who speaks to me through my cell phone, video games and "rap music." let's not even get into the amount of work i have this week and my friday deadline for my blood, sweat and tears project -- those involved PLEASE..-- ish is hectic. so i'm sitting here with an ice grill/screw face and coffee mad at any and everything in my general vicinity.

today is also my best friend's 3-0 so happy bday to him. the problem with their bday is that it's been a happy reminder my whole life that mine is only 15 days away but this year it turned into a chinese-water-torture-with-a-guillotine-blade-above nightmare. judging by the slew of emails that i've received from various '75'ers since jan. 1st i'm not the only person going through this hellishness. *sigh*

but, it's wifey and patrick's bday today and i send out a happy bday on your personal holiday :-)

now back to sulking.

math

the popes dead and that's one compared to the 300,000 dead in Dafur, mathmatics.



if it's all mathmatics it doesn't add up somehow - Mos Def

Buddy Christ

on sunday we went to church to see wifey's rather unique cousin get baptized. I was sitting in this old swedish church wondering why everything seemed so catholic when the priest walked down with his crew. most of the p.crew were carrying candles but one dude carried a cross and when they turned around i noticed that the cross reminded me of the above picture. so i sat there practicing my church proven 'don't laugh' routine, it worked though barely (it is a little rusty).

they also had this dude sing from balcony behind us so we sat looking ahead while he sang. dude's voice told everything about him, you could tell that he LOVED to sing, very much so. i know that sound in peoples voices from going to one of the most singin'est colleges in the world. everyone can sang there --with a slew of grammys to match-- even the janitor. pple walk around singing at the top of their lungs on their way to class, gospel of course (since it is a christian college). anyway, dude couldn't actually sing though but it felt right because behind his voice you could hear that this is what he thought about all week, what he looked forward to, what made him happy. his hands probably shook as he put on his tie that morning and reupped his comb-over while picturing singing in church. it had this sadness tint to it mixed with whispers of "without this my life wouldn't be." a sad smile for your ears.

my favorite little racist

okp put me on to this.

snabb

johnnie died :-( humanism *sniff* and plane tickets *sigh*

attention:non-whites

if you decide to blast your school or co-workers (who are also non-white) and expect to get front page columbine coverage remix your plans because it won't work. dude unloaded his gun on his teachers and classmates (this is a very, very wrong thing-to the mentally unstable peole who write me) and rode backseat, not even shotgun, to coma lady.

coma lady, not trying to shit on anyone's opinions on this but my little brother was in a coma for a total of 10 days and the supreme court didn't hear shit about him. they just unplugged him and remade the bed.

aural scribbagetry

has my preaching has not been in vain but i shall continue.

as i stood before my world

today was one of those beautiful spring days where the sun looks down on the bastard snow to show that those eight minutes ain't the only thing that's ahead. we headed over to the bastard melting snow and ice covered beach that her family owns to look out over the baltic sea. i built a fire, which i'm very proud of and will continue to share firestarting tips with wifey, who for some reason isn't that interested in it. as i stared into the fire it reminded me of all of the times i got in trouble for fire and how i used to say "when i get older i'm going to play with fires everyday!" eh, not quite how it works but fire is fun!

life, wifey and the pursuit of happiness (before 30)

i've been getting a few emails regarding the fact that i haven't regularly updated here and i'd hate to anger the millions (ignore the post counter it's wrong) of regular viewers who check in here. i'm sorry. life has been quite hectic of late, to say the least, and i'm on the warpath for financial security by my 30th bday (April 19th) not to mention my ever churning plans of world domination (which i think people are starting to see is VERY serious). so let me update you, as if anyone cares 'quiet!! Smeagol!!".

monday we went to the premier of Be Cool. red carpet and all with an enormous table of fun green bottles of beer that i so love :-) had half of one. there enormous amount of wanna-be-seen early 20's pple there also. i went to network so i ignored them, though wifey (who looked ever so lovely) was seriously annoyed by them. we went in and mtv nordic's veejay talked to the camera, not the audience, then introduced Christina Milan who came down the aisle with an enormous bodyguard who she told to sit at the foot of the stage. i guess there were a lot of death threats from sweden for the beyonce jack or something. hmmm. she did her contractual best telling us of the "fun" behind the scenes but no beef there she's just doing her job. then the movie starts with one preview of the Queen La vehicle Beauty Salon surprisingly produced by the same people who brought us the phenomenal movie breakthrough classic barbershop. damn what a pitch "see it's like barber shop but *pause* with women! try watching that in a swedish movie theater and you'll see the already building frustration on my part.

the movie comes on and let's just say that i'd rather listen to 8 hours of the dry vocals of j-lo's 'best' ballads then deal with this. 30 plus into this shit we left. gar-bitch.

tuesday and wed were nothing but meetings and we headed up yesterday to wifey's parents in northern sweden. the bamas at the airline had us sitting in different seats with my 6'4 frame crushed between two dudes trying to out quiet each other and wifey behind me. safe flight and the addition of wireless to someone in wifey's neighborhood makes our stay so much more fulfilling.

now to get back to catch up work.

.

L.E.T

there are few albums that hit you as hard as this one hit me. so dust this one off and push play.

ice'd

so ice skating is on in the backgound (yeah i'm man enough to admit f u) and i look up to see this girl rip it. i'm talking crunk'd HBCU matching band response in the crowd type throw ish on the ice shit. the next girl came on the ice all slim cutta with low self esteem and gave her best 3.5% the crowd looked like jeffery osborne took the stage after lil' jon.

the countdown continues

questions: what do you mean to your friends? who are you to them? do you have a balanced relationship with them? if not, in what way is unbalanced?

just a few questions for questions sake.


getting tricked into shopping with wifey is a cruel and inhumane thing to do to a man. women please take note.

I'm a connector

and since i found that out i've been busy using my new found title. of course some people have a tendency to think that i won't connect bodily parts with harmful intent but they will soon learn. you must. otherwise i've been getting my connector-ness on.

lately i've been more than a little down. i miss being around people that come from where i come from, were raised like i was raise etc. that reminds me, i noticed a little secret about sweden-- this country is full of white people-- but keep that on the low.

welp back to getting my connectornesstivity on, did i mention that wifey and i hit the terrible 2's yesterday? of course that's 2 years of "going steady" but i'm quite proud of that achievement for many different reasons (most of which i'm patting myself on the back for, damn i've been in europe too long).

for your weekend listening pleasure

J*Davey "No More"

Tanya Morgan 'Stay Tuned' review

now that is some good writin' there, i tell ya

Stockholm is 800 islands

which means that this would be a GREAT!! bday present for me (April 19th). picture this, wifey and i are driving with the Tanya Morgan/J*Davey mixtape blasting when traffic starts to get bad we look over see water and BAM!!! we're heading toward our destination without any delay! i'd like to thank you all, in advance, for buying this for my upcoming bday. Sure it cost around half a million but that's such a small price to pay for our vehicular happiness.

if anyone has an ideas as to how to stop snow from falling please email me at LOQuent at Gmail dot com because i'm fuggin tired of this ish. i've never been in a place that snows so frequently but collects snow so little. it will snow all damn day to simply apply a fresh coat to the snow on the ground and i'm tired of it. it's march, which according to my first grade dick and jane books is for flying kites with a medium sized coat on. I see no grass to fly a kite on and much less any medium sized coat weather! this is unacceptable and needs to be corrected now!


thank you

L's embarrassing moments list - 7th grade edition

- at a house party and met this girl i instantly had a crush on. a little later everyone got in a pillow fight and i hit her so hard she flipped over the couch. for some reason she didn't like me after that.

- Called up this girl i was trying to holler at and played a part in a Fat Boys song where Buffy beatboxed "I Love You" but screamed "Like!" into the phone.

- the summer after 7th grade i was a junior counselor at a summer camp. we went to the beach and i rode a boogie board for the first time. as i get up i notice that my trunks are kinda extra heavy in the crouch area then i feel this slimy feeling moving a little. it was a jelly fish and i stood there and screamed like a b-i (in manly way of course). people were telling me to drop my draws but i refused until they held towels around me. for the rest of the day i was joked. the last day of the camp they made a play around it.

....

Thug duggery : Ldef 2 cent remix

here i am listening to J*Davey and i came across
this village voice piece about the destruction of h.e.r. i've had discussions with various peoples regarding this topic which pains me because the equation multimillionaire=violent acts doesn't add up unless your g.bush and co. personally i don't condone such foolery when done by grown ass men and feel that if you got out you should appreciate it move on and kick open other doors. weak.

so i'm sitting here listening to "Sensitivity"

Ralph Tresvant's for those slow and in diapers. I noticed dude ran outta breath on his 2 bar "rap" (which for some reason was allowable in the late 80's for singers without the threat of violence). how do you run outta breath on a 2 bar corny ass "rap"?

I Hate You

juswt words when thrown around without the true sweet taste of unadulterated haterd. the kind of hate that wakes you up in the middle of the night because your dream was so painfully vivid and beautiful because you could smell the blood. hate is an art that can't be used in blanket terms, it's specific, utterly personal, something to reach for then hold on to with a steel grip that Death couldn't pry from your hands. hate makes you smile, whole, pure.


I HATE YOU:-)

i was just fluxbloggin'

when i happened acrossfiona apple, i like fiona apple and it hurts me that they don't wanna free fiona over at sony. fiona and i only have one problem and that's for her making me feel like i did something wrong by watching her video where dudes foot is in her face. she should apologize but besides that creepy feeling inducing video, which i liked, she did a dope album and went the esthero route on me. sadly a plethora of "artist" who didn't do good albums showed up time and time again to annoy my aural space.

in other news i saw a dude wearing a 97 model motorola around his neck today... it had one of those cheap plastic/pleather cases around it where you can see the buttons but the plastic amazingly protects them from the grim on your hands. don't, really, please.

my flu is amazingly letting up as of late though it's like those cats that come over your house and you give mad hints that you'd like them to leave but they turn the channel or ask when it's time to eat. my old roommate was like that. he'd invite himself over to my apartment and bring up convos about girls we used to touch IN FRONT of my then girlfriend. i'd be on some "no, i don't remember that" and he's say "you know the brown skinned bitty with the FAT ASS! remember you touched her in the bathroom of.." anyway, he'd come over and eat chips and chill 4 hours past his welcome on a regular basis until i had to get gangsta and give him a 'to go' time when he came over. i wish i could give the rest of this flu a 'to go' time.

free fiona dammit!

so you wanna be a writer?

follow L's easy how-to program which any writer will tell you is the write way (corny pun intended).

1. get a quiet place

2. a computer or pen and pad

3. a playstation 2 (xbox will suffice also)

4. a telephone



once you know your assignment sit down turn on the computer and your ready to start. first check your email so that it doesn't get in the way of your artistic endeavor and make sure that you respond to any emails that need to be done away with so that they aren't over you head while your creative juices flash flood.

clear your mind, wait your quiet place isn't quite clean so why not take a few minutes and clean it up. there's no reason to be lax on your cleaning job and if you notice that there's dust under the couch you might as well get under there... actually if you take off the cushions wash them and dry them it would make it a lot better. okay got that done? let's get back to that work. speaking of work where are you in your NBA Live™'05 season? Last time you played you were on a 20 game winning streak and 21 is 3 times 7 so it would be a better number to save your season to so one quick game won't hurt plus it will relax you and allow you open the dam of your mind easier. okay, you lost and messed up the streak but it was understandable that you had to play 2 more games to feel better about that loss. now it's time for work. speaking of work isn't your bestest friend in the whole world at their grind staring intently into a computer screen helping THE MAN™ hurt the world? there's no reason you shouldn't pick up the phone and call them because they need to know that your there for them. okay they had a computer virus at work (damn PCs) so your bestest friend had 2 hours to spare which you all took full advantage of but now your about to write the equivalent of the I have a Dream speech and you feel it cause goosebumps on your neck, of course since it will be so great maybe you should tell everyone about it on your blog. with that done your REALLY ready, okay, what should you start with... wait is that Bye, Bye Love on tv? such a heart warming movie about divorce in suburbia everyone should watch this at least 12 times. the last strands of james and ben taylor's i will are still ringing in your head and you've just realized that your going to win the first ever oscar for written word so you'd better get this labor of love on the road... wait it's that late? hmmmm, being that you are a day older than you were yesterday sleep is something you should start to take seriously especially since your going to win the nobel prize with this one so good night.

now you are officially a writer.

sidenote: still NOT a writer.




music to fuck to - portishead